“How to Save My Marriage: Two Steps toward a Better Marriage” by keene NH is a book on how to deal with the issues of old age and family counseling. The author of this book has seen both the good and bad sides of marriage life and managed to write a very encouraging and comforting book for those who are in marriage trouble. This book was inspired by a similar situation that his friend suffered from many years back in a marriage that broke down. Like many others, he too was looking for answers and ways to save his marriage, which eventually led to this remarkable book.
The author takes a positive approach towards marriage counseling and suggests that marriage counseling requires two important ingredients: a positive mindset and willingness to change. These two ingredients go hand in hand and need to be applied if the marriage can ever get better. In his words “If you want your marriage to be better than it is now, you will need to do two things. One step is to put aside the negative thoughts that are keeping you from seeing the optimistic reality that is out there and the two steps is to make yourself open to the possibility of getting your marriage back”.
This book is jam packed with practical and helpful advice. The author starts off by giving a good overview of what is involved in marriage counseling and outlines how to distinguish between the good and bad and how to avoid getting involved in a bad situation all together. In the next few chapters he talks about the two types of marriage that you can fall into: the happy marriage or the unhappy marriage. He also gives some practical advice on how to deal with old age and family problems. In this section he even provides a definition of old age and what it entails.
The problem with this book is that at the end of the book there is only two steps. The first step is to quit dwelling on what happened in the past and dwell on what is going on in your future. This is where most people give up when they are in the middle of a divorce proceeding. The second step is to change your way of thinking and develop a positive view on life. I think Mr. Neighbor’s advice is good in that respect, but he goes on to say “Do not expect miracles because there is no such thing as a miracle in love”.
That in my opinion was really quite blunt for a book written at a time when marriages were still taking place and marriages were still having their ups and downs. I suppose it would be unfair to call his book outdated because it still holds true today. However, with that being said, I do believe that the information in the book that is presented may not be for everybody. If a married couple is struggling through a rough patch, this book may be of use to them. That being said, this book is not for the faint of heart.
For a couple who has everything in place and who have been together for fifteen years or more, I think this book would be very beneficial. If for some reason the relationship has hit a hurdle and there is little hope for improvement, this book could help the couple to work through the issues that are causing the relationship to be in trouble. It may also point out some areas for the couple to work on that are directly related to the problem that is causing the relationship to be in trouble. As I stated earlier, Mr. Neighbor’s advice is good for the couple. For those who are not in a marriage settlement or marriage counseling program, I recommend this book.