A Review of Love and Marriage by Steven C. Ulrich

Love and marriage have always been a topic that is tackled at the dinner table, at the family barbecue, and at the neighborhood block party. People have always been looking for answers as to how to make the best of love and marriage. A question often asked is how to create a successful marriage that will have a happy ending. The author tackles this age old question in this well researched, entertaining, and informative book.

Three black high-powered African American couples come together in a book to help the growing community of Huntsville, Alabama, continue to grow in love and marriage. The authors are outspoken social conservatives with deep Christian beliefs who have each shared a deep passion for helping their fellow man. The newly wed couple shares their story of overcoming an abusive marriage and coming together in search of healing. Through their dialogue and experience they present practical suggestions as to how to make marriage and love to work for the benefit of all involved.

The author begins the book with a simple observation; “Marriage is war.” As a result, much of the book is taken up discussing the nature of war, especially between husband and wife, and the different emotions that can arise from these conflicts. Specifically, some of the content addresses how to deal with feelings of acute emotional desire and passion in a relationship while avoiding resentment and destructive conflict. As a second observation the author considers love and marriage to be an “adversary” that must be conquered. This book thus covers many of the history’s topics on the nature of marriage and the adversarial nature of it.

The third section of the book looks at how various couples handle various marital issues. This includes how some couples successfully deal with infidelity, how some manage the loss of a spouse and how some couples overcome intimacy issues. The author then turns his or her attention to the more problematic aspects of marriage. These include the dynamics of child rearing, how to bring siblings into a married relationship and how to deal with differences over money and children that arise out of a committed relationship.

Part four looks at how marriage and love can survive through the challenges of the future. The author examines the ways in which current practices and structures can adapt to meet the needs of couples in the coming decades. He or she also examines the ways in which traditional gender roles may be transformed in order to better serve the interests of women and families in the coming years. The final section of the book looks at the effects that a volatile personal economy will have on the institution of marriage and the stability of it. The author concludes by proposing nine possible solutions to the issues that couples will face in the coming years.

While Love and Marriage do not offer a one size fits all solution, it is a book that offers its readers a rich pool of resources for future and current life experiences. It is intended as a guidebook for married couples. The nine chapters cover various issues related to arranged marriages and the role of religion in them. The nine chapters also cover material on how to start a family, the responsibilities of a family and how to raise children.