How can answer the question, “Is it ever too soon to save a failing marriage?” By telling prospective client that there are at least two vital pieces to this answer. The first is a measure of motivation. Have either spouse or both partners completely given up on trying to make things work? Secondly, is entering couples counseling just a means of visualizing the final stage of divorce? The answer, “yes,” will likely be obvious to any rational mind.
In order to understand if it is ever too soon to save a broken marriage, the latter question must be addressed. Has the marriage gone so far as to require professional intervention? Some partners may believe that they have reached the end of their rope and divorce is imminent. While this is not the most common occurrence, it is also not an uncommon outcome. Couples who think that they have run out of options and that saving the marriage is only going to prove difficult (and, in some cases, impossible) are the ones who are most apt to enter counseling.
Those who believe that it is never too soon to save a broken marriage should be wary of what exactly constitutes “saving” a marriage. The term is often used in non-custodial relationships, when the failed marriage has been repaired with professional intervention (i.e. psychotherapy, Christian counseling, or marital therapy). In these circumstances, the failed marriage is often considered over. However, it is important to note that each failed relationship must necessarily be saved, if the parties are to succeed in having their relationship healed. And, while professional help may be necessary, it should always be considered a last resort, after all else has been attempted.
One of the questions that often arises when someone is contemplating how long it is too soon to save a broken marriage is: how much has been inflicted on the injured party? The injured spouse is likely to feel pain and suffering for a prolonged period of time, even after the marriage has been repaired. It is difficult, however, to attribute that suffering solely to one party.
Each person who is involved in a marital affair must, no matter what the circumstances, be held responsible for what his or her part in the infidelity is. This is because, whether one believes it or not, one’s actions (whether unwittingly or deliberately) will always have consequences. Therefore, if you find yourself being blamed for the hurt spouse’s pain and suffering, it is imperative that you do everything you can to defend your position and take responsibility for what is yours. If you can’t do this effectively, you need to get a divorce lawyer immediately.
Another question often asked when it is time to “save a broken marriage?” revolves around the idea of children. The majority of people who cheat never have children; they have no desire to do so and certainly don’t have the financial ability to support them. When a married couple with children decides to strangle their spouse for reasons of revenge, the resulting offspring will likely end up with nothing at all.
Sometimes, people think that by hurting a spouse, they somehow become sympathetic. In reality, though, being sympathetic towards a person who has recently been through an ordeal is a completely different thing than sympathy towards a person who has intentionally injured another. Those who have been burned with anger know firsthand how one can become consumed in a warped world of moral relativism. Worse, they may actually begin to think that it is acceptable to hurt a spouse. If someone is purposely hurting you or your family, and you react by hitting them back, you are condoning this type of behavior.
When it is time to “save a broken marriage,” ask yourself if you are prepared for the consequences. It is never good to stick with a partner who is continually hurting you. You need to be strong enough to protect yourself by making sure your husband or wife never finds out what you did wrong – let alone find the right way to tell them. If you do not take action, sooner or later you will lose him or her to someone else. Act now to save your marriage before it is too late!