My spouse ignores me. He simply does not return my phone calls or respond to emails. I find this very disturbing. I used to be the sole breadwinner in the family and now my wife makes all of the important decisions. She tells me all the time that she loves me, but I wonder what she means. If she truly loves me, why doesn’t he?
The truth is that if your spouse does not love you back, he will not give you any reason to stay with him. If he loved you, he would want to come back to you and spend every waking minute with you. If he loved you, he would feel close to you – maybe even have more close relationships with other people. If your spouse does not love you back, you are his biggest problem in the marriage. No wonder he doesn’t want to spend time with you.
Why is it that when you want to make your spouse happy in the marriage, you act to make everything about you – your looks, your career, your kids – better? When you are with your spouse, you need to let him do what he wants to do – and be happy doing it. In order for a marriage to work, you have to relax and let go a little. You need to let things pass you by sometimes so that your spouse can take action without impeding on your happiness.
My husband has become distant because he thinks that he does not deserve me. He thinks that the marriage is a failure and he resents me because he feels like I am abandoning him. He says that he only wants to be with me when I am happy and that he does not want to burden me with his problems. He also seems to worry that if things ever fall apart, he will be left with no assets or kids.
These are not his real qualities however. He still loves me and wants to be with me. It is just that he feels like I don’t love him back as much as before and he is taking action to correct this. He can’t stand the fact that I am making a big fuss about the marriage and wasting time and money to do so.
My husband has made it clear that he does not want to talk to me anymore. He tells me all the time that we are not on the same page and that I’m not helping. I know that sounds harsh and it is. I have been trying to get him to talk to me and back to me but he just won’t. This makes me resentful because I love my spouse and I don’t feel that he loves me back as much as he did.
The key to fixing this problem is to understand that it stems from a few different sources. It is mostly caused by how you were raised by your parents and society generally accepts that as fact. Another factor is that your spouse resents you because you have chosen to play the field of pampered, nice-girl while he goes out with his buddies and bores on the likes of football and bar hopping. Finally, there is a disconnect in communication. You probably don’t talk to each other as often as you once did, and this leads to arguments and bitterness.
You can see that you can take action to repair your marriage if you take the right steps. First of all – stop ignoring your spouse. You’ll see that this makes him feel free to talk to you and it will make him want to be intimate with you again.